Overwhelmed, Overworked... and Utterly Inspired

“The Road” Cover Art by Elle Otero

“The Road” Cover Art by Elle Otero

Dear readers,

I must admit that I meant very, very much to publish the third novella for the In Caves and Catacombs series a year ago exactly. I also meant very, very much to update this blog. But here we are, at the tail-end of 2020, and I am just now wrapping up what I swore I'd accomplish 12 months ago.


I'd give you a laundry list of reasons why this year was awful, but I’m so dreadfully tired of the sadness. The anxiety. I don’t wish to fixate on the relentlessness of COVID and its expanding impact on our world. On top of that, enough terrible things befall the characters in The Road that I just need to inject some (hopefully not toxic) positivity into the world right now. We have been so very, very fortunate that very few members of our family have caught COVID. It is such a deeply frightening experience, as so many of you know. So I'm going to attempt to share a bit of levity and joy by focusing on the good things that have come out of this year for me and my family:

  1. Evie: Our daughter is a constant source of goodness and love. This year she turned 2, and she is the sweetest child "that ever I seen", to quote her directly. Her request of Santa this year was "To give mommy a present". Hand to God. She is an incredible human being, and I'm 40% positive she's not manipulating me for more fruit snacks.

  2. Steve: My husband Steve and I have grown closer. We have shared our deepest fears, done our best to prepare for the worst contingencies we could imagine (many of which did not come to fruition, thank God), and have practiced patience and understanding with each other. I don't have anything funny to add because I'm being sincere AF. Steve is a lovely human being and I am grateful for him every day.

  3. Gardening: Our garden that we panic-expanded (well, rushed our existing plans for) in February has been incredibly bountiful. I'm still shockingly bad at growing good corn, but we can grow the heck out of tropical and semi-tropical rare fruit species, so, a net win. Also, we have added chickens. Ever since we sold our country property and moved to a smaller lot in the city, we've been chicken-less. Not so anymore! There's nothing like waking up to their lovely little clucking. Also, Steve has since fixed the dog door so we no longer wake up to it, but it's nice to hear when we go outside.

  4. Work: Work is insane. I work in the field of online education and technical training, and we were understaffed before the COVID crisis began. Going from approximately 5% online courses to 100% virtually overnight was crazy in March, and the repercussions of that switch are still reverberating to this day. Despite feeling overwhelmed and overworked all of the time, I still consider this to be an incredible privilege because there are so many out of work, losing their businesses, or scraping by on unemployment. I am truly grateful for the opportunity to continue supporting the transition to online learning.

  5. School: School is also insane. Yes, in late 2019 I began working towards my PhD with no idea what 2020 would bring. And now I've made it a full year into the three-year program (am I dreaming? does anyone finish in 3 years?) and there's no turning back now. About half of my motivation to complete my doctorate is pure, but the other half is because I'm totally going to make people I dislike call me Doctor. I challenge you to find anyone who's doing it without that in mind. They know in their deepest, darkest place in their hearts exactly what I mean.

  6. Writing: What? How did I find the time? I still don’t know how, but I've actually finished The Road, were you even paying attention??? Artistic inspiration is one of the few things we can rely on when the world feels upside down. I have furiously scribbled during my breaks and stayed up too many late nights, but I’ve finally finished the third novella. While it is not the drafted novel that I’ve been kicking around for years, The Road is a major accomplishment for me nonetheless because it required a total rewrite. I was ready to hit publish one year ago when two very dear friends told me to wait. Let it sit. As much as it pained me then, that process of rewriting made the story far better and more developed than it would have been otherwise. Furthermore, it has also given me the opportunity to seriously workshop it with my writer friend, Marysia (I will link to her work as soon as I can, because she's amazing). The workshopping process has been delightful and such an incredible learning experience, and for that, I am eternally grateful.

There are so many more things to be grateful for this year. Breadmakers, for instance. Jellybags. And growing closer to our family, friends, and neighbors, even at a distance. Seeing our communities band together to get through the COVID pandemic has its own kind of beauty, and it shines a light that cuts through the darkness of death that has shadowed our world for the better part of a year. 2020 has indeed been awful. If you lost someone, I am so, so sorry. I hope that you will find peace, and hope that you will find a way to honor that loss.

If you can find it within you, let’s come together to celebrate what we can. Merry Christmas, dear readers, and Happy Holidays!